Tag: presence

“Why are you making such a big deal out of it?!” my daughter challenged, angry with me for being upset.  I was walking ahead of her, head down, working through my feelings on my own, but ready to burst.  She wanted me to be over it. She wanted me to say “it’s ok.”  She wanted […]
I spent yesterday afternoon planting bulbs.  While taking a short break from the planting, my three year old son emerged and asked if he could blow bubbles. Normally I’d get the bubbles out and hand them to the children, letting them play while I get on with my own adult-world jobs.  But I was tired.  My knees were […]
Sometimes I wonder whether the difficult choices I make as a parent will actually pay off.  Although responsive parenting is what feels right to me, it isn’t always the easiest way to parent especially because it can be so different from what other people do. In being different, parents who choose to go against the […]
Parenting has a way of bringing up experiences long-forgotten in the past.  Yesterday I took my eldest daughter to an all-day rehearsal for her orchestra. We stopped on the way to pick up another child, arrived at the high school where the rehearsal was taking place, and went in.  Immediately the girl we carpooled with […]
Today I sat down at my computer ready to write.  I stared at the blank screen, typed a few sentences and hit a brick wall.  As I stared at my fingernails, waiting for inspiration,  my eldest child (9 and home ill from school) said, “Can I go on Pottermore?”  If you’re not familiar with Pottermore, […]
An analogy that I once read that has given me pause for thought is that meeting a child’s needs is like filling a cup.  The more you fill the cup, the better your child will feel, and children whose cups are full will naturally ask for less.  So when your toddler is desperate for attention, […]
I knew something was up when I could hear water rushing upstairs.  I wondered whether Aidan had turned on the taps in the bathtub, and at worst, I thought I would have to go upstairs to turn them off and bring him downstairs.  What did I find?  He’d managed to plug the sink with a […]
This morning I groggily padded downstairs to be met by my six year old who, having been up for at least an hour before me, wanted me to help her get a snack out of the fridge, set up a messy art activity for her, tell her what plans we have today, and listen to her […]
One of the worst times of day for me is 8.55am when I am trying to get the children out the door on time for the school run.  In the morning there always seems so much to do: breakfast, hair brushing, teeth brushing, uniforms to put on, musical instruments to practise… I have to get […]
This week my daughter has found it difficult going to school.  Squabbles with her friends, which adults see as petty but mean the world to her, have reduced her to tummy aches and tears every day.  My experience tells me that these problems will pass; but she doesn’t know this.  Her pain is real and […]